The Port

It is 12:24 in the morning. In less than twelve hours, I will be in another surgery. This time, I get a port put into my chest. Like I mentioned previously, the port serves as a readily accessible point for IVs and chemotherapy.

It is weird. Today, I started looking forward to the surgery. Being diagnosed with cancer, I prefer not to spend days sitting idle. I have a hard enough time laying around all day- not taking part in my regular life. My mind goes even more crazy when I am not doing something to beat this disease.

Overall, I was rather active today. Although, by the time the evening rolled around, the fatigue started to wear on me. During the afternoon, I met with my Pastor to discuss my disease. I had been looking forward to getting a chance to sit down and talk things over with him. After the meeting, I came home for a short nap. Around 5:30, I left to attend my first school board meeting since being diagnosed. Once the school board meeting completed, I came home for the evening.

I wrapped things up with a visit from a friend who I had not seen in quite some time. Before arriving, my friend said she had been an emotional wreck. She was having a hard time dealing with the fact that I was diagnosed with cancer. At one point in our discussion, she said she was not that worried anymore after seeing the calm in my demeanor. Naturally, she asked the reason for my ability to stay calm during a time such as now. I am not sure I have an ability to stay calm. Instead, I would say that I have a faith that gives me confidence and strength during such a tough time.

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed and broken. We are perplexed, but we don't give up and quit. We are hunted down, but God never abandons us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going. Through suffering, these bodies of our constantly share in death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.

2 Corinthians 4:8-10