The Anticipation
Right now, I am sort of in a holding pattern. I am waiting on two things.
First, I have not had my typical chills and fevers the past couple of days. I have actually felt well enough to get out at times. While it is nice to experience some "good days," the feeling also leaves you wondering when the "bad days" will come again. Just like any life altering event, this disease has taught me to appreciate each day one at a time. Still, the fear of the unknown exist.
Second, I am waiting on my full diagnosis as well as the start of my treatment. With all of my tests complete, there is not much I can do between now and the end of the week. Dr. Fitch, the doctor that I saw at the beginning of this process, called this morning. While he is not a radiologist, he was able to take a look at the images from my tests last week. From his knowledge and perspective, he stated that the cancer is concentrated to my chest, and I am clean in areas such as my spleen, abdomen, pancreas, etc. Beyond medical talk, Dr. Fitch always makes sure to ask about mental state of my mind. With so much going on, I appreciate the little things like that...
Yesterday, I had the difficult task of breaking the news to my baseball team. It was the first time I had been to practice in quite a while. At the end, I took the boys aside. All in all, it went pretty well. I explained the treatment process, and the results it would have upon my health as well as my involvement with the team. I assured them that I would try to be at games and practices when possible, but the chemotherapy would not always allow it. There were a few funny questions like, "What are you going to do about your job with the school board?" and "What is the worst type of cancer?" 12 year olds can really ease the tension and put life into perspective. At the end, they all talked about shaving their heads. I told them to hold off for now.
First, I have not had my typical chills and fevers the past couple of days. I have actually felt well enough to get out at times. While it is nice to experience some "good days," the feeling also leaves you wondering when the "bad days" will come again. Just like any life altering event, this disease has taught me to appreciate each day one at a time. Still, the fear of the unknown exist.
Second, I am waiting on my full diagnosis as well as the start of my treatment. With all of my tests complete, there is not much I can do between now and the end of the week. Dr. Fitch, the doctor that I saw at the beginning of this process, called this morning. While he is not a radiologist, he was able to take a look at the images from my tests last week. From his knowledge and perspective, he stated that the cancer is concentrated to my chest, and I am clean in areas such as my spleen, abdomen, pancreas, etc. Beyond medical talk, Dr. Fitch always makes sure to ask about mental state of my mind. With so much going on, I appreciate the little things like that...
Yesterday, I had the difficult task of breaking the news to my baseball team. It was the first time I had been to practice in quite a while. At the end, I took the boys aside. All in all, it went pretty well. I explained the treatment process, and the results it would have upon my health as well as my involvement with the team. I assured them that I would try to be at games and practices when possible, but the chemotherapy would not always allow it. There were a few funny questions like, "What are you going to do about your job with the school board?" and "What is the worst type of cancer?" 12 year olds can really ease the tension and put life into perspective. At the end, they all talked about shaving their heads. I told them to hold off for now.
posted by Chris at 10:56 AM
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